Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Free to be the Girl Scout I am at Heart

Do you remember the first time that you really felt free? I remember. I was on the back of a horse named Grey, galloping across a pasture, whipping past dogfennels three feet high. I was eleven years old. My feet were planted hard in the stirrups of the saddle and my hands held tight to his mane with the reins looped through my fingers. I remember feeling the wind against my cheeks and the sun on my face; I remember thinking that this must be what flying was like, that this must be what it feels like to break past fear into that quiet, joyful place at the center of your heart.

It sounds silly now, but for the longest time I was so afraid of what people thought of me. I was afraid to wear anything that made me stand out. I was afraid of looking foolish. Basically, I was afraid of walking through the world looking on the outside as I feel on the inside because I thought that wasn't what anyone wanted to see. Then one day, I realized that it didn't matter. It didn't matter if anyone laughed, it just didn't matter. Life is very short and precious and I couldn't keep putting off the moment when I would recapture that place in my heart because if I waited, it might never happen. And the truth is that most people don't laugh, actually many people compliment me on my outfits. And I'm still always surprised and flattered.

P floral girl scout

P ka close

P trenched

Pdetail

P ka close 2

P trench bow

P floral girl scout 1

Pdetail 1

P ka close 1

P trenched 1

Dress: Thrifted Vintage 70's shirtdress
Trench: Thrifted Vintage London Fog
Beret: La France Vintage
Cardigan: Anthropologie
Scarf: Thrifted Vintage
Tights: Target
Earrings: Gift
Shoes: Born

What triggered all of this was editing these photos that I took of my outfit yesterday. Now that I look at them, I think I resemble a girl scout or Nancy Drew, but I like it. Three years ago, when I left graduate school, I wouldn't have dared wear this out of the house. My outfits aren't avante garde, in fact I think the only really strange thing about them is their formality. But they're an expression of who I am and when I wear them, I feel free to be myself and to make other, bigger choices in my life that also reflect who I am. Its not the same as galloping through a pasture of dogfennel, but it does feel pretty good to walk down the street proud of who I am.

19 comments:

  1. I love this outfit and I think that the beret along with the raincoat make a perfect pair!

    i was so close to buying a london fog not to long ago!

    Again great set of pictures!

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  2. i love your outfits all the time.. but with his post, i especially love what you wrote about being free and believing in yourself. stay positive and lovely, dear! :D

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  3. Love what you wrote about feeling free, you just made my day :)

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  4. I loved reading this. I think everyone can relate to what you said in some way.

    Love your outfit too! I thrifted a skirt with a similar floral that I plan on wearing as a dress. I was going to wait until warmer weather...but you make it look so winter-appropriate here, I might just wear it sooner!

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  5. It's funny as we get older we don't care as much what other's think. You are right, life is super short and we just don't have the time to waste not be ourselves. It makes the world a richer place if individuals embrace and show their uniqueness.

    I love the dress, it's really sweet and the green beret is very cool. The last picture is my fav, I do like your trench!
    xoxo
    ps so loved it that Mr rocked out!

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  6. Oh, that dress is as sweet as sugar! It's so lovely on you.

    I have to agree with your sentiments. I spent all of my secondary education trying to 'fit in' and I never felt like anything I wore or did was me at all. But then when I started wearing vintage, the world felt all a little better!

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  7. I'm so glad you came to this realization :) I had a similar moment. And like you, I'm not terribly innovative or crazy, but the way I dress does get me noticed, negatively at times, though not usually. I've found my confidence grows regardless. You look lovely, as always.

    xx

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  8. I agree, life is short to be worrying what other people think... as long as you feel good about yourself, then go and enjoy what you love to wear.

    It's Nancy Drew... I can imagine her wearing that trench and the hat and the pretty dress. You are lovely Kelley Anne and that smile is so sweet. xoxo

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  9. I'm in love with your adorable dress !

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  10. Love this, you pull it off so well!

    www.ameliais.blogspot.com

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  11. just love the trench, the dress, the beret--and most importantly the inspiring reminder to thine own self be true!

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  12. I take resembling a girl scout or Nancy Drew to be a particularly good thing!

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  13. I think a lot of times, we presume and stereotype more than we should - I'm very guilty of that! It's really nice to know that when you finally let go off yourself, the people around you embrace who you truly are. That's so sweet.

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  14. What a great outfit!! I love the trench and the beret and I'm still smitten by that cardigan!

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  15. Aw, I was a Daisy all the way to a Cadette, Girl Scouts holds a special place in my heart.

    As we get older, we realize all the things like this, but as much as growing is a pain sometimes, it's good to grow out of those juvenile thoughts.

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  16. I was eighteen, and I climbed a mountain, and I stood at the top with my two best friends in the whole world (one girl, one guy) and we just stood there quietly with an arm around each other. Happiest I've ever been.

    Oh, and NEVER CHANGE PLEASE.

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  17. I'm loving all this brown! Your cardigan is adorable as well as that amazing floral dress! I think the trench and hat has that Bonnie and Clyde/Nancy Drew feel!

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I'd love to hear your thoughts!